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Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.worldEnglish · 7 months ago

Relationship goals

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Relationship goals

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Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.worldEnglish · 7 months ago
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  • Cyrus Draegur@lemm.ee
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    7 months ago

    i like a mutual relationship where neither of us take it in the ass

    • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netOP
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      7 months ago

      Missed opportunity

      • Tikiporch@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        Don’t inverse kink shame. Prude shame?

        • thesporkeffect@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          My kink is extreme aversion to variety.

          • DJDarren@thelemmy.club
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            7 months ago

            My kink is thirty disappointing seconds of plain vanilla missionary with the lights off.

            • Backlog3231@reddthat.com
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              5 months ago

              deleted by creator

      • MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml
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        7 months ago

        Preferences.

    • BarrelAgedBoredom@lemm.ee
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      7 months ago

      That’s where the cum button is tho

    • BetaBlake@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Your loss because that shit is lit

    • z3rOR0ne@lemmy.ml
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      7 months ago

      Agreed. I mean, to each their own, but I’ve been open and tried the gamut of butt stuff more than a few times with a few partners, and I’ve gotta say…just not a fan of either giving or receiving anal. Oral, on the other hand…

      • Slovene@feddit.nl
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        7 months ago

        You don’t perform oral on the hand, stoopid.

      • Allero@lemmy.today
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        7 months ago

        Oral is above everything

        But anal play is really good too for those into it.

    • Fuckfuckmyfuckingass@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Coward.

      • Nelots@lemm.ee
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        7 months ago

        Name checks out.

      • Cyrus Draegur@lemm.ee
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        7 months ago

        Guilty as charged! I’m deathly afraid of having to deal with fecal matter any more than I absolutely have to.

        • Trainguyrom@reddthat.com
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          7 months ago

          Unironically a great reason to use condoms. Condom protects the interted item from fecal matter, and can be disposed of after the fact meaning cleanup is quick and easy

        • EleventhHour@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          That’s why you wash first

          • Cyrus Draegur@lemm.ee
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            6 months ago

            if poop has touched a surface, turns out i don’t care how much you wash it, ACTUALLY. no matter how thorougly sterilized a sewage pipe is, it’d still be insane and disgusting to use it as a drinking straw (for those who enjoy ‘eating ass’ for instance).

            • EleventhHour@lemmy.world
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              6 months ago

              He clearly don’t know anything about anal sex if that’s what you think it is.

  • psycho_driver@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Woah woah woah I’m all about getting pegged but I draw the line at chores.

    • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netOP
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      7 months ago

      Pegging is less painful

  • Pacattack57@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    If my girl allows me to put it in her ass it’s only fair I take it as well

    • frigidaphelion@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      I mean there’s a whole erogenous zone that dudes will neglect just because of archaic religious traditions and values

      • TrueStoryBob@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        Seriously. Straight dudes are missing TF out.

        • srestegosaurio@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          7 months ago

          I’m straight and I like it tho.

          Fragile masculinity makes you miss a lot of things ig.

          • TheRealLinga@sh.itjust.works
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            7 months ago

            I couldn’t agree with you more. I’m straight, and I love it when my wife does stuff to my booty

        • __Lost__@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          7 months ago

          It’s a shame that gay guys have such a monopoly on butt stuff

      • acockworkorange@mander.xyz
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        6 months ago

        Eh. Tried to find that miraculous erogenous zone in the arse… nothing there. Not a yuck nor a yum. Just really did nothing for me.

  • 5714@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    7 months ago

    Weird that this is a meme, that’s how relationships work (anal is optional).

    • Nuke_the_whales@lemmy.world
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      That’s how people aim and like for them to work. But nobody does equal on everything. I don’t expect my wife to carry as many groceries as me, or to deal with the heavy lifting or bugs. But she deals with shit I despise like booking appointments and dealing with the kid’s school. Are we 50/50? I can honestly say I do more but I don’t really care as long as everything is trucking along and we’re happy

      • 5714@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        7 months ago

        Plain verbs don’t imply 50/50 IMO.

  • JoShmoe@ani.social
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    7 months ago

    Can you imagine the difficulty of keeping the inside of your butthole clean for your partner? I just don’t get how some people can maintain that. Kudos to those that make the effort.

    • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 🏆@yiffit.net
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      • agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works
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        7 months ago

        Lava vs magma

      • BetaBlake@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        I think it’s mostly a sight thing, as long as I can’t see the poop then I don’t care

        • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 🏆@yiffit.net
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          7 months ago

        • toynbee@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          Jim Jefferies has an entire routine on this, but I don’t really want that in my search history.

      • mayhair@discuss.tchncs.de
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        7 months ago

        taking the community name literally, huh …

    • thedirtyknapkin@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      not to be too stereotypically reddit butt…

      a bidet makes it a lot easier 😅. it shoots a little water up in there like a mini douche every time. helps get those last little stubborn bits too if there are any.

      • WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        7 months ago

        What the fuck is the pressure setting on your bidet???

        • psycho_driver@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          “Death Star Superlaser”

        • 0ops@lemm.ee
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          6 months ago

          It goes from “A” to “G”

        • Manifish_Destiny@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

        • wavebeam@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          No no, he’s right.

        • thedirtyknapkin@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

          eh, is got a little valve and i just turn it all the way. i like the cleanness.

      • BetaBlake@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        This person gets it

      • Shou@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        I need to invest in a butt shower. No space for a bidet, but those buttoned showeheads are perfect. Visiting Oman brought enlightenment.

        • Tinidril@midwest.social
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          6 months ago

          There are bidet attachments for standard toilets that take up almost no space at all.

        • magic_smoke@links.hackliberty.org
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          Dedicated bidets make no sense to me, and they’re usually the obnoxious european type where its a fucked up combination of sink and toilet.

          Japanese style smart-toilet bidets are the shit. You install it on your regular toilet, and when you’re done you press a button and your asshole is clean.

        • thedirtyknapkin@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

          mine just attached under my toilet seat. the water line connects to the existing toilet water line. it came with the fitting i needed and was easier than Legos to set up.

          think i payed like $25 on Amazon like 5 years ago. i try not to buy from Amazon anymore, but I’m sure there are many reasonable options out there elsewhere.

    • TwoBeeSan@lemmy.world
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      Ex was cursed to be a hairy bottom.

      He did a ton a maintenance but it’s a butt, sometimes there will be shit.

      I had seen grosser things come out of vaginas. Sex is inherently gross (asexual bias lol)

      • Croquette@sh.itjust.works
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        I mean, even as a sexual person, when you stop and think about it, it is indeed gross.

        But my reptilian brain craves it. And my logical brain just doesn’t give a fuck anymore about how it looks like. I mean, I change diapers full of shit and piss every day and I’ve seen my two children be born in an ungodly amount of juices. My threshold for being grossed out has become a lot higher.

        • thedirtyknapkin@lemmy.world
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          the horny brain will actively chemically supresses our “ick” reaction. we’re literally less capable of being grossed out when having sex.

    • x00z@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Just get an anal douche.

      • JoShmoe@ani.social
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        7 months ago

        What did you just call me! /s

    • Nuke_the_whales@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      I don’t get the appeal honestly and I’m a bi guy. And I hate that every porn video devolves into anal by the way, can we get clearly labeled non small porn please?

  • burgermeister@lemm.ee
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    7 months ago

    Hell yeah brother

    • Zachariah@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      * step-brother

      • jia_tan@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        7 months ago

        did they stutter!?

        ^🎵sweet home alabama🎶^

        • Carl@sh.itjust.works
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          Why is the stereotype of incest, an Alabama thing? According to Wikipedia, it is only legal in New Jersey and Rhode Island.

          • Cataphract@lemmy.ml
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            7 months ago

            lol Alabama representative trying to throw off the scent.

            • Carl@sh.itjust.works
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              7 months ago

              https://media1.tenor.com/m/XetvQf_JDtAAAAAC/skeletor-out.gif

  • loopedcandle@lemmynsfw.com
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    Guys have you not tried pegging? Highly recommend.

    • Allero@lemmy.today
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      Second that.

      It feels very good, both physically and emotionally (after you get used to the idea you can be on the “receiving” end). And many, many girls love it! They love to experience sex in a very new way, love to feel what you normally get to feel, and you’ll likely love it too!

      • srestegosaurio@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        Sameee.

        I was somewhat skeptical at first but it’s fun. I recommend. IGN 9/10.

  • grrgyle@slrpnk.net
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    7 months ago

    Legitimately though.

  • TheReturnOfPEB@reddthat.com
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    deleted by creator

  • شاهد على إبادة@lemm.ee
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    7 months ago

    💯

  • workerONE@lemmy.world
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    Not to demonize ass stuff but this seems like it says boyfriends who cook and clean are gay/bi… Am I missing something?

    • itsralC@lemm.ee
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      I mean, the picture does (seem to) show a heterosexual relationship. Unless you think only gay/bi dudes do butt stuff then idk what you’re reading into

      • workerONE@lemmy.world
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        This seems like a right wing meme. Really, at first I didn’t see this was a shit post so that’s my bad.

Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world

lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world

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You are not logged in. However you can subscribe from another Fediverse account, for example Lemmy or Mastodon. To do this, paste the following into the search field of your instance: !lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

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Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

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-Do not Brigade other Communities

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