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kewwwi@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 11 months ago

fruit

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fruit

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kewwwi@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 11 months ago
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  • ThePyroPython@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    I don’t know which of you degenerates need to hear this, but: DO NOT FUCK THE PINEAPPLE!

    • jol@discuss.tchncs.de
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      11 months ago

      I’m afraid to ask, but you seem experienced, so here goes: why not?

      • TheMightyCanuck@sh.itjust.works
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        11 months ago

        Just a shot in the dark here… But pineapple enzymes are strong enough to eat the skin inside your mouth…

        Now imagine that but on the much more sensitive skin of your dick

        • jol@discuss.tchncs.de
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          11 months ago

          Good point.

        • AEsheron@lemmy.world
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          11 months ago

          Pineapple is so metal, fucking fruit that tries to eat you back.

        • Ænima@lemm.ee
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          11 months ago

          Maybe it’ll feel like those little fish that eat the dead skin off your hands?

      • Ð Greıt Þu̇mpkin@lemm.ee
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        11 months ago

        The juice is highly acidic to the point of being able to tenderize meats without assistance

        Put your salami in that and it’s gonna come out looking like chorizo

        • laranis@lemmy.zip
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          11 months ago

          Put your salami in that and it’s gonna come out looking like chorizo

          Pure poetry. Your words have convinced me to keep my junk outta exotic fruits.

          • flambonkscious@sh.itjust.works
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            11 months ago

            Pussy!

            • BigFatNips@sh.itjust.works
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              11 months ago

              P(ineapple)ussy

              Pinussy, if you will

          • MeThisGuy@feddit.nl
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            11 months ago

            deleted by creator

        • NielsBohron@lemmy.world
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          11 months ago

          It’s actually not (just) the acidity. Pineapples and several other tropical fruits have an enzyme called papain that breaks down peptide bonds in a rather unique way, to the point that the texture of the meat can become quite off-putting if the enzyme is not used properly

          Edit: acidic or not, it’s definitely best not to put any sensitive parts of your anatomy in pineapple juice

          • Ð Greıt Þu̇mpkin@lemm.ee
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            11 months ago

            I wonder if those tenderizing properties are what make people swear by pineapple slices on pizza and burgers

            Knowing how much Hawaiians love spam, they’re probably over the moon for accompanying elements that can compliment or add to or even concentrate those porkey and salty flavors

            • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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              11 months ago

              The ham on pizza is sweet though, imo not a good match. My preference is pineapple, pepperoni (or chicken), and jalapenos. Get spicy, sweet, and salty all on one slice, ето заебись.

              • RecluseRamble@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                11 months ago

                ham on pizza is sweet

                What? Where? Ham isn’t supposed to be sweet.

                • Ð Greıt Þu̇mpkin@lemm.ee
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                  11 months ago

                  Nah there’s ways to prepare ham to be on the sweeter side, haven’t heard of it being done that way for pizza though. Usually it’s for a deli cut or charcuterie plate.

                • chatokun@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                  11 months ago

                  There is a whole franchise in the US called Honey Baked Ham. Americans love their sugar.

              • The Menemen!@lemmy.world
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                11 months ago

                Pineapple-Chicken-Cheese (Gouda) makes an awesome sandwich. With Pizza I am an minimalist and almost only eat Margherita.

              • BubbleMonkey@slrpnk.net
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                11 months ago

                My preference is pineapple, black olives, and onions.

                The black olives give the same salty as meats, so it works out quite nicely. I’m not typically into spicy pizza, but onions and pineapple go nicely together when cooked, imho.

              • TheOakTree@lemm.ee
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                11 months ago

                Pepperoni pineapple pizza (PPP?) is underrated. Bonus points for mushroom and jalapeno. And maybe onion.

        • MudSkipperKisser@lemmy.world
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          11 months ago

          I’d like to be known as someone who “tenderizes meats without assistance”, that seems like a compliment of the highest order

        • RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world
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          11 months ago

          Put your salami in that and it’s gonna come out looking like chorizo

          Sentences you never thought you’d read.

        • Hylactor@sopuli.xyz
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          11 months ago

          And if you out your charizo in there, it’s going to come out looking like landjäger!

          • Aggravationstation@feddit.uk
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            11 months ago

            Landjäger? I barely know her!

      • far_university1990@feddit.de
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        11 months ago

        Pineapple has enzyme that eat flesh

      • its_prolly_fine@sh.itjust.works
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        11 months ago

        Pineapple juice can be used as a meat tenderizer, for cooking.

      • BakerBagel@midwest.social
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        11 months ago

        It’s juice is very acidic and will not feel good when it gets inside your urethra.

    • werefreeatlast@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      They said if you eat lots of pineapple it makes your cream filling taste sweeter.

      • MeThisGuy@feddit.nl
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        11 months ago

        speaking from experience?

        • werefreeatlast@lemmy.world
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          11 months ago

          We don’t talk about Bruno or Bruno’s juice.

  • ThrowawaySobriquet@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    No coconut? Coward

    • kewwwi@lemmy.worldOP
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      11 months ago

      hes not fucking nuts

      • Purple_drink@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        Beautiful

    • EfreetSK@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      That’s how you get maggots

      • jol@discuss.tchncs.de
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        11 months ago

        Oh no vietnam flashbacks

  • SendPicsofSandwiches@sh.itjust.works
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    11 months ago

    “What’s up everybody it’s critical, today I bought the 1.2 million dollar fuckable grapefruit”

    • Qkall@lemmy.ml
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      11 months ago

      I don’t care if I go blind, I don’t need to see the price tag anyway

    • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Somehow, the “sold out” is the worst part 😄

  • SPRUNT@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    Dude, that’s not what melon-baller means.

  • TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    frussy

    • SomeGuy69@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Username checks out

  • hOrni@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    Where’s the link to the video? I remember watching this guy fuck various pasta dishes.

    • kewwwi@lemmy.worldOP
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      11 months ago

      there is video?

      • PmMeFrogMemes@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        ooh buddy you’re in for a treat

      • tabarnaski@sh.itjust.works
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        11 months ago

        The guys name is John Kilo.

    • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      11 months ago

      Wait was this the Cup Nood guy?! It’s been so long.

  • JimVanDeventer@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    Can elope 🥰

    • volvoxvsmarla @lemm.ee
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      11 months ago

      Did… Did you just make the post wholesome?

  • BluesF@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    No I will not fucking hear you out Jeremy

    • I Cast Fist@programming.dev
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      11 months ago

      But the banana shape! It’s a sleeeeeeeeeve!

  • BezzelBob@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    Bro is single handedly gonna discover the first human×fruit homunculus

  • Yareckt@lemmynsfw.com
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    11 months ago

    Is this guy trying to fertilize a boiled ostruch egg?

    • NielsBohron@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      I believe that’s a cantaloupe.

      • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        11 months ago

        Well they might have to if he got it pregnant.

    • Crackhappy@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Is there another way?

      • werefreeatlast@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        The republicans made it clear. Unless that watermelon is dying and is not in a republican state, that melon 🍈 baby 🍼 is going to be borb!

    • AEsheron@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Allegedly.

  • corus_kt@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    Hard to tell if that’s a shadow or if he REALLY enjoyed the pineapple

    • MrJameGumb@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      • Rustmilian@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        Fact : Pineapples have tiny needles that cause irritation.

        • jol@discuss.tchncs.de
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          11 months ago

          What?? But we eat that shit.

          • Rustmilian@lemmy.world
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            11 months ago

            Raphide

  • THCDenton@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

  • db2@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    https://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2002/02/11/wow16

    • RagnarokOnline@programming.dev
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      11 months ago

      A man of culture

  • MrEff@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    And? What were the results?? This man has done science for us, what were the results?!?!?

    • MissGutsy@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      (Warning: NSFW) The source (includes a ranking at the end)

    • DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social
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      11 months ago

      He put vodka in them. It tasted like fruity vodka.

      • ironhydroxide@sh.itjust.works
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        11 months ago

        Vodka… Right… “Vodka”

        • DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social
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          11 months ago

          Look, we can joke about fruit fucking, because it’s hilarious, but let’s not pretend we don’t know a barely functional alcoholic when we see their sleeves.

    • janNatan@lemmy.ml
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      Results? No, no. I need the documentation of what happened. I’ll, uh, come to my own conclusions after that.

  • Bruhh@lemmy.world
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    Your fruit fucking skills are remarkable.

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