If someone wants to give up dating due to their looks, age or genetics (that includes mental state) that’s a totally valid reason if you ask me. As long as it doesn’t translate to misogyny no one will get hurt. However a lot of people seem to be ticked off by this idea, why?

  • FeelzGoodMan420@eviltoast.org
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    2 days ago

    Huh? I’ve literally never once heard anyone criticize people who choose to be single or asexual. What are you talking about? You gotta go outside and touch grass man. Get off the Internet for a while.

    • MolochAlter@lemmy.world
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      13 hours ago

      To be fair, are there many conversations where that comes up at all unless someone in the conversation is an ace/aro person?

    • TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works
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      2 days ago

      there’s a TON of hate/distrust for asexual people. “you are just ugly” “you just haven’t met the right person” “why are you celebrating that you don’t have sex? that’s weird” etc.

      • partial_accumen@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        there’s a TON of hate/distrust for asexual people. “you are just ugly” “you just haven’t met the right person” “why are you celebrating that you don’t have sex? that’s weird” etc.

        What kind of conversations are you having with people that would respond like this where they’re learning about how much sex or not-sex you’re having?

          • partial_accumen@lemmy.world
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            1 day ago

            If you’re posting on the internet in a broadcast form (just as Instagram) about deeply intimate details of your life, you should not generally expect heartfelt nuanced discussion. You’re going to get short attention span pithy responses (as your example shows) or harsh reactionary responses from fringe minority positions (also as your example shows).

            Those are internet responses. Those are not representative of real life. This is what the prior poster was telling you.

                • TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works
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                  21 hours ago

                  in what way did I share a positive view of it???

                  I think this is it. The difference between having a ‘type’ (normal) and being ‘black-pilled’ (weird) is the misogyny.

                  I said there’s hate for my demographic and SHOWED PROOF, how you trying to say I’m wrong??

                  I genuinely don’t understand what you’re trying to say

    • throwawaycardboard@piefed.worldOP
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      2 days ago

      Get off the Internet for a while.

      You first.

      It’s about the reason for choosing to be single. When you talk about how you won’t date anymore because of your looks, people will take exception to that.

      • angrystego@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        Stopping dating because of looks sounds misogynistic. It implies all women are superficial, which is simply not true. I know several cases of men that could be seen as ugly for different reasons, who had no problem to find a partner thanks to their personality.

        • throwawaycardboard@piefed.worldOP
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          2 days ago

          Well personally I think all people are secretly superficial in that regard. Both men and women, whether they’re aware or not.

          • meco03211@lemmy.world
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            2 days ago

            That’s because that’s how you see the world. It’s hard for you to comprehend someone else not thinking the same way you do.

          • angrystego@lemmy.world
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            2 days ago

            That’s the problem, people are very diverse. Look around yourself for examples of couples (in real-life, not online), and I’m sure you’ll find many examples of “ugly” people of all genders being in happy relationships. I know a guy with a facial deformation in relationship with a beautiful woman, I know a seriously fat couple. The forever single people I know mostly have severe mental or personality issues.

          • MolochAlter@lemmy.world
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            12 hours ago

            Getting in shape won’t make you think you’re less ugly, you’ll just find different things to obsess over until you find something you can’t change.

            Dysmorphia is a mental illness issue.

            You can be ugly, or out of shape, or any of those things, but the idea that you are so uniquely, supremely ugly that you can’t make up for it in other ways is literally just internet idiots being idiots and not touching enough grass.

            I’ve seen men with very obvious deformities happily married with kids, I’ve seen perfectly toned bodybuilders being (correctly) snubbed for being insecure dickheads, I’ve seen perfectly average dudes dating models, looks matter but not the way you think they do.

            Get out of your head, get treatment if you truly have these feelings of immeasurable ugliness because they are a legit sign of treatable mental illness, and for the love of christ go out and make some normie friends, you clearly need them.

            Normies are happy not because they “don’t get it” but because they are typically pretty well adjusted and average, while your online friends are just like you: a bunch of toaster fuckers who met in the toaster fucker forums reinforcing eachother’s obsession with dicking down toasters.

          • Brekky@lemmy.world
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            2 days ago

            If the only reason you get healthy is for someone else I would argue that’s still not healthy