I have the same thing except it’s my dad. I’ve been able to become lucid on occasion when it happens and it’s like I get to hang out with my dad again. I have yet to tell him he is dead in the real world when it does occur. I’m afraid of what will happen if I do.
This sounds like my personal nightmare. I’d never be able to relax knowing someone could drop by any moment. You’re way more friendly than I.