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Cake day: July 3rd, 2023

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  • It definitely can. It took me 5 years after my kids were born to feel relatively normal again. 5 years is a long time to feel like you’re essentially trapped in your home. Granted, covid certainly didn’t help with that, but the pressure to act like everything is amazing all the time never made sense to me.

    Kids are hard. There’s good moments too but as a percentage of your time they are more rare than the bad. Your brain does a good job of filtering out the bad when you look back on those times but that doesn’t make it easier to deal with in the moment.











  • krashmo@lemmy.worldtoLemmy Shitpost@lemmy.worldPar for the course
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    2 months ago

    This kind of thing is an interesting topic. Obviously Zuck is a shit bag but that’s not what I’m talking about.

    I’m not one to say that men are being repressed or that masculinity is under attack, although I do think elements of both of those things are true if the statements are interpreted in a generous fashion. I’ve found that people will accept the general statement that men have problems but talking about men’s issues in any detail is usually met with scorn. You can say “men have problems like everybody else” and that’s generally tolerated but if you say “X Y or Z is a problem for men” then all of a sudden you’re misogynistic or otherwise associating yourself with team white male privilege. I see this happen essentially every time the topic comes up. The vibe seems to be “we’re dealing with everyone else’s problems so we don’t have time to listen to your complaints”.

    People like Jordan Peterson and Andrew Tate have made a career out of listening to those problems. They offer shitty solutions and horrible explanations but they’re paying attention and in return they get views from people who don’t feel like anyone else is. There are a lot of guys out there doing their best to be good people who need to feel like their problems matter to society. You don’t have to abandon the things that are important to you to listen to them. Just commiserate a bit and a lot of them will be happy to listen to your problems in return. That’s how empathy is supposed to work.






  • Apparently not. The world would be a much better place if we all stopped making such a big deal about specific trigger words and focused on the ideas being communicated. If someone’s intent was to be an asshole then sure, get the pitchforks out, but make it clear it’s the idea that’s bad. Don’t just scapegoat the word. If they weren’t obviously trying to be a dick then calibrate your response accordingly.

    To put it another way, if you’re upset about the use of a word that a scientist might use to describe something then you’re probably being overly sensitive.