why is that one on a leash?

You never hear dog owners getting asked that question.

If I’m ever in a relationship again

I could learn from that optimism.

“I followed the instructions exactly except that I took one left turn instead of a right turn. I don’t know why I didn’t arrive at the correct destination as I followed the route exactly.”

I think it’s why Liberace was mentioned. In the closet and (what I would describe) as gay with bad taste.

Does it bite… or spit?

If “probed”, would it considered animal cruelty?

I need my morning stew.

😋

If you want, you can have me as an enemy.

That way you can have one more grumpy and unsexy enemy.

I could probably grow a mustache like that, but I think my chances of getting kissed are low enough as it is.

“A Weird Symptom”

“Aliens With Shutguns”

It’s not a mental illness! You can’t force someone to be straight.

So you’re just saying that america isn’t the only one; what about other countries.

Whataboutism…

The question remains: What are the real americans going to do about it?

It’s not going to get better by itself, and the rest of the world can’t just come over and fix it.

Careful, your age is showing.

Only when I can’t procrastinate any longer.