There’s obviously no need for durable footwear when your whole country is a boot.

It’s what I’m here… Fore!

On average, the first hour of a video game is sub par.

If it’s a golf game, you’re doing all right then.

I’ll take it, the alternative is a real shit-hole.

Client must not have read the part of the contract that said the developer would get paid on a per-interaction basis.

My knowledge of Roman numerals is insufficient to decode it but my weight’s been “ERR” for years.

Somebody read a post about negging but couldn’t think of a real thing to be an asshole about.

Both names come from the same word (Petrus or Petros meaning rock). As you might expect, German “fist” and French “péter” for “fart” are distant cousins too: “pezd-” -> “fistiz” -> “vist” -> “fist” or “pezd-” -> “peditum” -> “pét” -> “péter”.

“Péter au jus” for a French spin on it.

I think I did. If there’s a prior source out there, I might have heard and forgotten it though. Happy to share in either case.

Played the trump card early.

Suddenly, a flash in the distance turns into an angry, boiling glow. At least getting knocked back to the stone age means not having to see thousands of versions of “I told you so” afterward.

With a big subwoofer so you can really feel every rumbling flap of the sphincter.

The chair doesn’t deserve this kind of punishment.

Made in pirated Photoshop (even though he uses GIMP).

A casual stroll through your local anti-personnel minefield should do it. Bring tourniquets.

And once it reaches the front of that queue, cue it.

Is this how you wake up the sheeple?

This plus a cron job, problem solved.

Those were the days.