It still wouldn’t be the weirdest or worst part of that film. Off topic, but I’m convinced the movie is the dramatization of the narrative that Wonka presented to his company lawyers. For half of that stuff to exist and work as it does, there’s got to be a real horror story running behind the scenes.

It would be better not to use plastic at all, yeah. They definitely leach plasticizers from the polymer into the water, even if they’re BPA free. My standard bottle is stainless steel. I’ve heard good arguments for glass, but it’s too fragile for me. Aluminum bottles usually have a plastic liner. Nothing is perfect. I just try to limit waste and reduce harm.

It sounds like you have a level of understanding beyond me. I just have have browser ad blocking.

Every single day?! Have you tried more red meat, dairy, processed grains, cheese, saturated fats etc?

Infinite poop. You sit on the toilet to poop, but the poop never stops coming out of your butt. You have to start flushing the toilet every two minutes to keep up. You try to pinch your butt closed but that makes your insides hurt. The poop accelerates. You call 911. The paramedics call for doctors. The doctors call for specialists. The story trends on Twitter. You turn down talk show appearances. Your septic tank fails. People form a cult. Your toilet is finished. Volunteers arrive with buckets and shovels. You are completely used to the smell. The poop accelerates. You are moved to a stepladder with a hole in the top step. The poop accelerates. The shovelers abandon the buckets and shovel directly out the window. The poop accelerates. A candlelight vigil forms around your house. One of the workers falls over and can’t free himself. The poop accelerates. A priest knocks over the stepladder and tackles you out the window. You land in the pile. The poop accelerates. The force now propels you forward and upward. Vigil goers grab at your legs. The poop ignites from their candles. The Facebook live event hits 1 million viewers. The poop accelerates. You are 30 feet in the air. The fire engulfs the vigil and your house. 60 feet. The poop accelerates. The torrent underneath you is deafening. 5 million Facebook live viewers. You try to close up shop but your butthole disintegrated long ago. 120 feet up. Your house explodes. The poop accelerates. 1000 feet. You are now tracked on radar. You try to change your angle of ascent but you should have thought of that way earlier. The poop accelerates. 4,000 feet. NORAD upgrades to DEFCON 3. Concentric circles of fire engulf your city. The poop accelerates. You have broken the sound barrier. 30,000 feet. You no longer take in enough oxygen to sustain consciousness. 60,000 feet. CNN is reporting on all the world records you’ve broken. 200,000 feet. You are no longer alive. The poop accelerates. Your body disintegrates but your poop contrail remains. NASA can no longer track you. You break the light-speed barrier and we can no longer bear witness. The poop accelerates. Forever.

It’s also pretty unrealistic, just biologically/medically. Most people need to have their poop day once per month, if not once per week.

That makes sense. Firefox has some good extensions, if you just want it browser-based on your phone, and f-droid has some whole-phone options. Just FYI in case you’re able to take advantage of one now or at some point in the future.

Edit: Also, does your phone have an SD card slot? If so, that can be an inexpensive way to boost storage and get more life out of your phone.

No criticism, just curious: why no ad block for the phone?

They really should just be water dispensers so people can fill a reusable bottle or cup. Water is such a basic, universal need that it should be readily available at all facilities that are open to the public. That’s generally the case, but I’d go a step further and argue that there should be a clearly marked water dispenser within an arms reach of each bottled water display. I buy bottled water sometimes, but it’s because I forgot my bottle. I use the new one as a temporary one.

I didn’t want to show my hand, but off the record, I’ve experimented with Norwegian beaver milk and Mongolian camel milk to achieve in vitro samples of sesenta y tres leches. Admittedly, it’s highly unstable and there have been casualties. Such is the price of progress.

That’s a good point. It seems to be an infinite series that should converge on one value of leche. If we solve for that, we should be able to make the ultimate torta de leche, which, paradoxically, is made with only one supreme leche.

I think we can go a lot further.

Common milk producers:

Cow

Bison

Goat

Sheep

Horse

Yak

Reindeer

Common milk types:

Evaporated

Condensed

Powdered

Whole

2%

1%

Skim

By my count, we should be able to do at least cuarenta y nueve leches. Are we even trying?

I think you’re just describing Black Friday.

This is how I feel about certain expensive meal replacement supplements.

Thank you so much! It’s weird, but my life feels more complete from hearing it and yet, now I fell like I know how Saliere must have felt. I will never come remotely close to topping that.

Soon:

O say can you drill, by the dawn’s early light,

What so proudly we hailed at the wellhead’s last gleaming,

Whose drill bits and flood lamps through the perilous fight,

O’er the mud pits we watched, were so gallantly reaming?

And the flare stack’s red glare, the crude bursting in air,

Gave proof through the night that our rig was still there;

O say does that oil-spattered derrick yet stand,

O’er our new vassal serfs and their occupied land?

It might seem overly self-involved, but sometimes you have to be shellfish to achieve your goals. There’s no arguing with the results. He got the hard body he wanted. On a side note, with all that straining, I thought he was going to pull a mussel. Sorry if these puns are getting clawfully bad. I wasn’t shore if this comment would work, but I didn’t want to scuttle the whole thing either.

I’ve heard some states/provinces and countries have capacity limits to reduce the frequency and severity of mass laserings.