I used to run a pizza place. Bad snow was some of the worst. Half the staff would call off and we’d have double the orders. We were in a mostly flat city on a grid, so we would cut delivery down to just the grid. People would be furious to be denied delivery pizza. “I just drove up the hill an hour ago! It’s fine!” Yeah in your truck. My delivery driver is in a beat up twenty year old four cylinder.

One day I tried to take our car to work and immediately put it in a ditch. I called my boss while I walked to work. I said we can’t do delivery today this is too extreme. He said oh just do the grid like usual. The only driver who showed up that morning wrecked his car on his third delivery. We always told them, take the topper off your car and hide it in your trunk. If insurance finds out you were doing commercial business they will not pay.

Don’t rub it in. I know.

I want to leave so bad.

I’ll just just repeat this here. I am a US laborer. I got two days paid time off last year, and when I brought it up, my boss suggested saving them for an emergency. I got an email January 1 that they disappeared.

It’s ok. It’s going to suck. Real men and women could provide for you. Not that you’re not a real woman/man, but in context.

Haven’t seen it, sorry.

No man

Hell is a word used sometimes in American English, usually southern, as an intensifier. In casual conversation where I’m from, if someone starts their sentence with “Hell,” they’re usually going to say something most people already are aware of, but put it into practical terms.

Oh yeah this planet ain’t even a pixel in the universe. Universe gonna be fine. Hell even earth will be fine once we’ve caused the extinction of all life, including us.

Yeah I’m pretty sure both regular and sour are switched back to lime.

Don’t be a fucking dick. Are you a child in age or just emotionally?

Wow. What prompted such condescension from my reply?

Please don’t do this to people. Yeah there are way too many pedophiles out there but you’re still so unlikely to meet one. Unless you go to church.

Some friends and I that hung out in college had this with 11:11 on the clock. Felt like we’d look at the time and it would be 11:11 once or even both times every day.

What’s unclear about that statement?

I absolutely refuse to watch something with a laugh track as well.

“Those are dead people laughing”

You made my laugh for the first time today. But you might not be far off the mark. It seems pertinent to repeat the old Chinese curse - “May you live in interesting times”. Shit’s become far too interesting for my taste.

So what’s your favorite? Regular or sour? I can eat sour Skittles until I burn my mouth.

I absolutely love sour apple candy and even I will admit that Skittles are way better with lime instead.

He looks like a shitty fucking Roman Emperor. Which is by design, minus the shitty fucking part.

You’ve got a lot to learn my son.