Refusing to reduce complex reality into slogans and clichés since 19XX

  • 4 Posts
  • 120 Comments
Joined 3 months ago
cake
Cake day: February 5th, 2026

help-circle



  • I was in an open relationship for around 7 years or so. I think our situation was perhaps a bit different though. I simply have no interest in sex myself, but I didn’t want to force my partner to live in a sexless relationship, so I gave her the pass to sleep with others.

    I wouldn’t say I never felt any jealousy about it, but I kind of even surprised myself with how little I was actually bothered by it. I almost felt more jealous about them having dinner together than the sex part. I’d theorize that any jealousy is simply a signal of lack of trust, and a lack of complete trust is going to be a disaster in these relationships. Open relationship might work for some but polyamory for almost nobody.

    Also, we broke up for different reasons. Neither of us considered the open relationship decision a bad one or as a cause for the breakup.




  • It’s endlessly both amusing and psychologically fascinating how you’re seemingly getting progressively more and more angry while just sharing your opinion before anyone has even had time to engage with you. It’s an objective fact that strong emotions cloud people’s judgment, so I can only wonder what it is that’s actually making you feel so emotional about it.

    Clearly you’re not just a passive, distant observer to this but you’re somehow emotionally invested in it as well. It’s not really that I necessarily even entirely disagree with what I believe you’re saying - it’s just the way you’re saying it that makes me a bit suspicious about what’s really going on in the back of your head, whether it’s conscious or not.

    It’s a cliché, but I feel like more often than not this kind of strong reaction to something that in no way affects your own life probably tells more about yourself than it does about other people or about what’s true in the world. I’m not sure whether you’re trying to convince us or yourself.

    Edit: Okay, I read your other responses and I see what’s going on here. Bye.




  • Every now and then there’s an Ask Lemmy thread along the lines of “what would you do if you could do anything” and the number of people sharing their violent murderous fantasies there and getting upvoted for it is genuinely staggering. Like you said: normal people don’t behave like that. If someone finds themselves having daydreams about murdering “the elites” or whatever, it’s time to get off social media and go take a walk outside.