Patient gaming ftw, I was able to get GTAV for free from epic games (only reason to have that stupid app)

That’s cool and all but does it work for kissing boys?

6% blood alcohol content is still pretty much lethal

Cum aside, the “B” being a stack of books is clever

Missionary is great for important stuff, like saying “I love you”, “we’re getting low on cheese”, and “you smell like your sister”

Do they? I asked not to get one and still found it in the bag, I have like 20 sitting in my fridge

Even the floor is sad

Me talking to my brain when I’m trying to sleep

It’s gay so you don’t have to

The perfect gift for that 1 family member you just absolutely can’t stand being I the same house with

I dont think so, you can tell by the shadow on the right

Are you insane? I’ll assume it’s a sphere, thank you very much

Shut the fuck up Mario, Luigi is hot! You’re the ugly one here!

“No I don’t have a doctorate, I just do it for the sport”

No but I get that a lot

Society

dies of old age at 32

“Dad the game is telling me to put it on my wrist”

“Yea only if you’re a coward”