I quit drinking for good.

Now, I only drink for evil.

There is no chicken

They’re not waving at you. They’re waving at the Jeep.

Because boobs

Epstein didn’t kill himself.

The Chiefs should change their name to The Swifties.

I hate it when I get my schwartz twisted.

Life finds a way

Ranch salad dressing

What Taylor wants, Taylor gets.

No project is complete without at least two trips to the hardware store.

Fantastic

You keep using that word.
I do not think it means what you think it means.

I like my girls like my cheese.
Fat-free American singles only

It’s just sleeping.

The moon landing was faked.

NASA got Kubrick to direct, and being a perfectionist, he insisted they shoot on location.

Hakuna Mavodka - It means no memories.

Hakuna Ma-vodka

It means no memories