I got that trait too. When I first picked it up, some 18 years into the game, I didn’t mind too much, but I didn’t realise that the trait gets worse as you level up? Apparently the version of the trait that my character has can be prevented from progressing by spending more time “outside”, but that just sounds like a scam intended to make me spend more on some new dlc or something.

I agree that hyper focus is a mixed bag. I’ve heard it works best for players with a really clear plan for their character build, so they can use the buffs most strategically, but I have no idea how people can make effective characters based on such RNG mechanics.

Regarding the depressed moodle, I feel your pain; I feel like whoever designed this game needs to read about reinforcing and balancing feedback loops, because it’s fucking dreadful with how easy it is to get into a losing spiral, where you end up with such severe debuffs that it feels impossible to get out of. Honestly, even though all my friends play this game and seem to have a lot of fun in it, I’ve come close to just stopping playing a few times, with how unfun it is.

This might not be helpful advice, because the effect doesn’t seem to proc for everyone, but apparently when you’ve been stuck with the depressed moodlet for a long time (and apparently some other conditions), you start to receive a hidden xp bonus to routine tasks. I always thought it was bullshit they told people to keep them playing, but I tried it once (almost out of spite to prove that it wouldn’t work), and I found that yeah, I did actually see bonus progression from lower level tasks that wouldn’t ordinarily give xp. I found that the “showering” and “eating” tasks were the highest yield, but the xp-farming loop was too grindy and I got burnt out too easily to keep it up alongside the debuffs. I found that the xp multiplier still applied to smaller quests though, like “use wet-wipes to approximate a shower”, or “eat a snack”, and I could do those things close enough to my daily respawn point that it was easy enough to do on the side.

This certainly isn’t a solution though. Like I say, the balancing of this game is out of whack, and it sounds like you’ve been having a grim time of it. I hope that you’re able to break out of this cycle somehow and find aspects of the game you can engage in again, whether that happens via the game gets a big balancing update (unrealistic hope with these devs, I know), or something other way (such as grinding, or finding an exploit in the code that allows you to shed your debuffs)

I want you to know that I’m screenshotting this comment (and the one you’re replying to) to send to a friend, who will find it very funny.

I do know an Anglican priest-in-training who refers to God with They/Them pronouns because thinking of God in a monogender way is weird to them. This apparently isn’t particularly controversial within their mini community, although there was a big argument once when someone suggested that capitalised pronouns (such as He/Him or They/Them) technically means God uses neopronouns

The way that someone explained it to be once is that if we think about the typical monotheistic, omnipotent, omniscient God — surely a God would be far more than what humans can comprehend at all, right? So any single characterisation of God is going to seem weirdly limited, because it’ll be grounded in our human perspective. So the idea is sort of like God™ is like a diamond, and each of the Hindu Gods is like a facet of that gem. The problem is that our human perspectives can’t understand the diamond (similar to how visualising 4D shapes like a tesseract is trippy and hard) so we have to try to understand the diamond by looking at each of its facets and trying to imagine an entity that can be all of those things at once.

As someone who is neither Hindu or Christian, it reminds me of the Holy Trinity: that God is the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

The thing is that this kind of thing works for people who don’t know better. I have spoken to dudes who like the abstract notion of Musk being a gamer, probably because it wasn’t apparent to them that his Path of Exile account was so obviously boosted. Similarly, a script-kiddie can seem like a skilled programmer to people who have little knowledge of programming

I’ve watched/played/read things I wouldn’t have discovered if there hadn’t been masses of people crying “woke” about them; there was a period where it was a really useful recommendation engine, because they’d be especially pissy if high quality stuff was woke. Unfortunately, that doesn’t work as well anymore, because “woke” is increasingly meaningless

Something that blows my mind is realising how much of our understanding of sex and attraction is socially constructed. For example, there are plenty of documented cultures where women’s breasts don’t have the erotic connotation we attach to them. The thing that really threw me off was learning about some people who don’t kiss as a show of affection — I found this a surreal concept, because in terms of romantic interactions with a partner, I’m fairly meh about sex, but I’m a big fan of kissing/making out; There’s a sense in which I obviously know that preference towards kissing is likely not an evolved trait, but more sociocultural, but it feels so intuitive that something so visceral isn’t necessarily an innate trait.

Anyway, this is a long way of saying “did we evolve to like butts, though?”. Evolutionary biology, the field that would consider questions like these, is unavoidably pretty heavy on the speculation side — given that humans have evolved to be such social creatures, we can’t really separate out the sociocultural aspects of development from the genetic side, and that makes asking evolutionary questions on large timescales to be a tricky endeavour.

Edit: This isn’t to say that asking these questions is pointless to do. I appreciated your question precisely because it’s the kind of thing that cooks my brain (and I enjoy that)

If you ever have a partner, friend or family member who does sewing/knitting/similar, you should tag along with them on a fabric/yarn shopping trip; I bet you’d have a lot of fun. Some people are just more tactile, and leaning into that isn’t harmful and can help a lot of fun

“I was lowkey hopping a commenter might suggest avoidance”

I’m proud of you for having the self-awareness to recognise your avoidant instincts and taking steps to counter that (i.e. by asking for advice from people). That might not feel like a victory, given that you were hoping people would give you “permission” to lean into the avoidance, but I’m familiar with the kind of hope you describe: it’s a shameful kind of hope, because deep down, you know that people aren’t going to advise you to ghost her, and that indulging your avoidant instincts probably aren’t productive — the shame comes from the tension between knowing what you should do, and your wish to instead take the avoidant path, which I imagine has served you well over the years as a go-to coping strategy, albeit a maladaptive one.

The tension between who we feel capable of being vs. who we’d like to be is quite uncomfortable, but it certainly shouldn’t be shameful. Building up healthier skills and habits is a marathon, and it does not require perfection. I hope that you are able to find the strength to take the approach that you understand to be the best, even though that will mean defying your instincts. It will feel clunky, and uncomfortable, but that’s just the discomfort of growth.

I hope you’re able to recognise that asking for advice here isn’t a sign of failure, but a show of your strong resolve to improve — I’ve found that asking for advice when we already low-key know the correct approach is a way of holding ourselves accountable: you want to communicate clearly and healthily; you also want to curl up so small that you can hide from this girl rather than talking to her. This conflict exists because for whatever reason, you’ve recognised that your people pleasing tendencies don’t serve you or the people in your life very well. Regardless of how you proceed from here, I’m proud of the steps you’ve already taken to improve yourself. I say this as someone else who had to learn these skills as an adult due to messy family stuff. It’s bloody awkward, and stressful, and it takes a long time; that’s why recognising the small steps forward is good

I appreciate you calling out this kind of stuff. It seems like in this instance, OP was just joking, but I’m deeply nervous at how many people are genuinely believing and propagating eco-fascist rhetoric nowadays.

I’m not sure I’m politically knowledgeable to know what a liberal is

(This is a joke, and I don’t need anyone to explain it to me. The thing I struggle with is discerning whether the people I’m talking to at any given point know what a liberal is)

Containerized software is huge in the sciences for reproducible research. Or at least it will/should be (speaking as someone adjacent to bioinformatics and genomics)

I had poutine at random place in Edinburgh which a Canadian friend said was the best poutine he’d had outside of Quebec. “Still shit though”, in comparison to in Quebec

My trick to coping with that has been to seek out rooms or contexts in which I’m the stupid one, relatively speaking. I sometimes struggle with insecurity when doing this (especially as a bright kid who was “a big fish in a small pond”), but I never feel happier than when I’m learning from someone knowledgeable and enthusiastic about their little weird slice of the world.

Congrats! It feels incredible when a " ¯\_ (ツ)_/¯ worth a try!" repair turns out well; I can practically feel your astonished jubilance through the screen.

I’ve got to the point where I have enough experience fixing things that I feel completely confident in my ability to have an initial look at the problem (possibly opening the device), and to know whether I’m likely to break things worse by dabbling. Sometimes this means immediately closing up the device, but increasingly often I feel comfortable taking a crack at the problem, and sometimes it even works!

The bear deserves better food

When I first started using Obsidian, I used folders too much because I felt like things were “messy” if not tidied away. I already knew that one of the weaknesses of hierarchical folder systems is how it can make having an overview of the system harder, but it took a while for me to properly understand that.

As you say, it’s necessary to be proactive with making links to things. I found that when I used Obsidian for journalling, I started to put square brackets around loads of stuff, because the inactive links didn’t do me any harm, but they did highlight what might be useful as active pages. Something I picked up from the Zettelkasten crowd was occasionally having a “Map of Content” page, where I used it as an index of topical links. It always worked best when I allowed them to arise naturally, as needed. Once I got the trick of this, I found I was able to find things far more easily, because I was able to navigate via the links.

Tags are a tricky one to use. I never found them useful as a primary organisation method — they were worse than both hierarchical folders and link based organising in that respect. They were super useful as an augmentation to my organisation though, especially when I used them sparingly.

This is all an overlong way of saying that yes, I agree with you, using systems like Obsidian do require a switch in how you think in order to best use them. Something that I always enjoy pondering is whether pushing ourselves out of our comfort zone is something that’s inherently good — something something cognitive flexibility? I don’t know, but I enjoy endeavours of this sort nonetheless

Incredible. I don’t know enough Prolog to be able to follow it very well, but this is truly what the internet was made for

This, a thousand times. Also echoing what someone below said that a physiotherapist may be best, but in my country, the doctor refers to a PT.

The reason why getting proper medical input is important is because often back pain arises because of long standing, complex imbalances e.g. I had a weak core, which caused my legs to lock in a way that sort of compensated, which caused me to have an odd gait and to fall lots. Generally improving your strength was a good step, but if you’re experiencing pain like this, you may need help in identifying any underlying weaknesses.

Especially because injuries don’t just come from heavy or intensive exercise. I knew someone who had upper back pain that likely stemmed from poor posture. They identified the muscles that were painful and started doing stretches to that area. Even though it was only light intensity stretching they were doing, they were inadvertently exacerbating the root problem, which they didn’t learn until they had to be seen by a doctor urgently.