I have a 16-year-old son. I’m in my early 30s (had him very young) and a professional footballer. My son also dreams of becoming a successful footballer (he’s been playing since he was 6), but he’s just… not great. He’s good, but not great - and in this extremely competitive industry you need to be at least great in order to even stand a chance. So I told him, as someone who’s been doing this for a very, very long time & is active in this sphere, that he should find another, more attainable dream. He took it as me not believing in him, but I’m just objective and realistic.
I don’t think you’re a jerk. I think you’re extremely fortunate. A guy in my old neighborhood had no backup plans, and one injury with permanent repurcuasions left him angry, bitter and hostile, also violent. I think you did the best you could on the spur of the moment, that’s fine. You are free to adjust as you seek wisdom. Best of luck to both of you!